One day at a Time, One Step at a Time

Raising a three-year-old is hard. Flat out. Hard. How do I discipline? Isn't she supposed to be potty trained by now? Why does she throw these awful fits in public? Why does she beg and beg for something as small as a rubber ball out of a vending machine, and then throw a huge fit about not getting it? How do I reward good behavior? Do I reward good behavior? And why does it seem to take five times as long to get ready to get out of the house?

Lately, there have been a few instances where I've lost my cool and just yelled. Actually I screamed. For instance, we were leaving the gym the other night, where now pretty much everyone knows me, and she was not ready to go, "You go back upstairs and work out Mommy. Come back in a few minutes, OK?" I have done this once to her request. Big mistake. Now, she thinks she runs the show and when I told her no, I had to drag her out of the gym, kicking and literally screaming to the top of her lungs. As I walked her out to the car, with both our bags and her, barely dangling on my hip, I just put my head down and made a bee line to the car. When I finally wrestled her into her car seat, I stayed outside the vehicle for a minute to catch my breath. Even that breath didn't work, so I ended up screaming myself.

Then there are those moments when Mommy's sense of urgency and Koko Bean's sense of stubborn three-year-oldness collide. For example, getting ready in the morning is quite the task. It's a lot of coaxing and negotiating really. If I try to put clothes on her, she wants to wear pajamas to daycare. If she does want to wear clothes, her socks have to be just right, which essentially means inside out so the line doesn't "bother" her. When we finally leave, I have to let her climb into the vehicle by herself. That's when she takes her time, observing every single extra in the car, like the "oh crud" handle. She'll want to touch everything and hang on stuff and push buttons, but when Mommy tries to speed up the process, she gets very upset and we have to do it ALL OVER AGAIN.

Don't get me wrong. I am glad Koko Bean is independent. I don't want to discourage her do-it-myself-attitude. There are many things I'm glad she can do herself. She always tries to put on her coat and her socks by herself. She was a very good girl when the chiropractor gave her her first adjustment today. She also loves to help feed the dogs and picks up her toys when we leave the gym daycare. (Now, only if she'd do that at home.)

I guess that since this is my first rodeo in child rearing, I have no idea what to expect, nor what I'm supposed to expect of her. It's definitely a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants sort of gig for which you can never be prepared. I am just praying that each decision I make for her, for me, for our family, doesn't disrupt development or her fragile self esteem. Kids are resilient though. I know she needs discipline. I know that getting onto her today isn't going to affect her tomorrow. She won't be mad forever. Hopefully, the only way it affects tomorrow is for the good. I know she needs love, and lots of it, but there are moments when I just need my "me time." Then there are times when I need to suck it up, put down the phone, stop doing the laundry, and just hold her. There will be a time she won't ask for it anymore and when I ask, she won't let me. And as I sit here and vent about raising a preschooler, I can't help but think how all the good will always wash out any bad, big or small, any day.

Learning as we go

As I sit down to type this at the island in our kitchen, I'm staring at an open dishwasher full of clean dishes, needing to be put away and a sink full of dirty dishes, needing to take their place. There are two stuffed animals sitting next to me and a real animal licking dropped quinoa off the floor.

That stuff can wait. I wanted to tell you all the things I have learned from my little girl recently.

1. It's okay to wear socks inside out, no matter how OCD Mommy is. Otherwise, the line bothers poor little Koko Bean's tootsies and she will let us know about it. .

2. It is also okay to allow your kid to eat a popsicle for breakfast. Mine doesn't eat the whole thing anyway.

3. Along the same lines of that last one, eating protein powder straight out of the container is quite tasty and entertaining. My coworkers would appreciate this as they all have to take the "protein challenge" when they start working for us. It consists of taking a scoop of protein powder to the mouth and eating it all. Only one person has passed the challenge, but Koko Bean could give him a run for his money soon.

4. Speaking of money...

We've been trying to potty train Koko Bean for about a year now and so far, nothing has worked. She does not go for candy, stickers, new toys, kisses, hugs, or extra food of any sort (What kid doesn't like ice cream, seriously?) We tried using the Farmer's Almanac method. That was a no go.

This kid is more like her Uncle Polly Wog that I realized. This morning she found her piggy bank and asked for some change, so I dug into our protein container used for change and gave her a couple pieces of change and a dollar bill. She wasn't that interested in the dollar bill, but went ahead and squeezed into her pig anyway. That was when it hit me. I hesitated at first, but then muttered something that perked her ears BIG TIME! I told her that if she pee peed in the potty, each time, she would get some money (a quarter.) She had just pottied about a half hour before this discussion so I figured she would just brush it off and continue to ask me for more change. Instead, that little girl jumped up, said "I need to potty now," and ran off to the bathroom. She did her business then held out her tiny hand. I kept my promise and gave her a shiny quarter. She ended up peeing in the potty three times at daycare as well!!! What a little negotiator!!!

5. Sometimes three-year-olds can have pockets full of grumpy bears. Yikes!

6. And somtimes those grumpy bears leave just as fast as they came and we're all smiles again.

These are just a few things I've learned in the past week. I'm sure there will be many, many more like this to follow. Each day, I have to do a double take. Did she just do that? Did she just say that? Where did she learn that? I didn't teach her that. Most of our days consist of routine things (because that's the way the Koko Bean likes it,) but during that routine, there are a plethora of non-routine things she says and does that make me more proud of her. Thanks for keeping me on my toes Koko Bean.

Whose toys?

Have I mentioned how much I love having a little girl? Now that Koko Bean is three, there is quite a selection of awesome toys for her. I am personally thankful for this as I get to relive some of my favorite childhood memories. For her birthday and Christmas, Koko Bean received a basketball goal, a big toy car that mom and dad can use with a remote while she rides, Barbies, baby dolls, and a Wii just to name a few. Let's just say Mom and Dad have been taking advantage. In fact, the other night Koko Bean wanted to play her Elmo game on the Wii but Mom and Dad wanted to play Dance Dance Revolution, so we compromised with her on HER TOY!! One of us danced with the Wii and the other remote controlled her in her car around the empty front room of the house. She was happy nonetheless. Dad still kicks mom's rear on the dancing game.
But there is something only Mommy is good at when it comes to toys. And that is fixing Barbie hair. Tonight, Koko Bean and I played Barbies. We dressed them up and fixed their hair. Koko Bean said the reason for them getting all gussied up was to go shopping. Of course. Everyone wears halter dresses, stilettos, and ball gowns to go shopping right?

Koko Bean is much like her mommy and isn't content focusing on one activity for long periods of time. Her imagination begins to kick in full blast and she starts getting more and more animated. Tonight was no exception. After playing Barbies for about a half hour, she decided the floor was a giant ocean and she started holding her breath, diving deep into the ocean. She would "swim" over to the couch, and "fish" for objects underneath it. Each time she "came up for air," she had a dog bone in her hand. There's where they went!! The dogs were happy she found the "treasures."

Then, all of a sudden, she came up for air, and pretended to spit the water in my face!! I pretended right along with her and wiped my face, surprised at what she had done. This made her laugh hysterically. I love watching and hearing her deep belly laugh. Each time she did it, I would act more surprised and "disgusted." And each time, she laughed even harder.

As I sat in the bathroom, organizing her hair bow drawer (a never ending task,) she bathed herself and Dora and told me about her day. Then we slapped some coconut oil on her hiny and Dora's hiny, and put her penguin "walkin' jammies" on. That was when she reminded me that I told her she could wear her Minnie Mouse jammies. Earlier, when I was folding laundry she had thanked me for cleaning her new Minnie Mouse pajamas and that she would prefer to wear them this evening. So, off went the penguin pjs and on went the Minnie Mouse ones. I really didn't believe she would remember our discussion, but she sure did! Then, it was protein shake, melatonin, acidophilus and calcium time for her and fish oil, biotin and resveratrol time for me, before I got to do something I rarely get to do- rock my baby to sleep. Usually that's daddy's job, but she let me tonight.

When Koko Bean starts to get tired, she crosses her little hands over her chest, and her eyes begin to get heavy. It's funny how you noticed these little ticks about your child. She also does this when she's nervous or anxious. This is when Mom and Dad step in and give her extra cuddles to reassure her that everything will be okay. She has done this since birth and it's one of the sweetest things I've ever seen. As I rocked her to sleep tonight, I watched her fidget and turn, then cross her hands over her chest and close her eyes. Here's hoping for peaceful dreams for her tonight. Sweet dreams my sweet angel. Mommy loves you. Daddy loves you. God loves you.  

Two Beauties on a Playdate



Today, we got to hang out with Little Lady. Little Lady's mommy, MWD, and I were sorority sisters in college. This is the first time the two girls have gotten to hang out besides Koko Bean's birthday party. What did the two little future squirrels do today? They got to go to opening day of Beauty and the Beast in 3D!!! We met up with MWD and Little Lady at the AMC for the 12:25 pm showing. The girls acted like they had been friends forever even though this is the second time they had even met!!
Of course Mommy and MWD were armed with cameras to capture the moment.

It was great to relive some of the feel good moments from the movie and share it all with a great friend and our girls. I  can't lie. I got a little teary eyed when Angela Lansbury aka Mrs. Potts, sang the title song. I loved every minute of it and kept my peripheral on my little girl who was mesmerized by it as well. Koko Bean sat still throughout the entire movie and even took a potty break in the big girl potty!! My little girl is growing up and I am enjoying the ride while she'll still let me escort her to the movie theater. Thank you MWD and Little Lady for our wonderful play date. We hope to do it again soon.

Flower petals, attitudes and a third birthday Celebration

Sunday January 8, from 6pm to 8pm, we had a HOUSE FULL! Who would have thought so many people would respond and be able to come to Koko Bean's third birthday party, that mommy would be in a tizzy all morning? I had started making cake pops three days beforehand so I would be totally comfortable with making them. I had more fun making those things than I've had in a long time. I ended up making around seventy cake pops.

Daddy thought that not everyone would want a cake pop, so I also make about four dozen brightly colored cupcakes!!

I had fun making those too. After preparing some chili and cheese dip and making some raspberry punch, we were all set to have a third birthday extravaganza. The theme was a flower theme.

Mine and Daddy's boss and his wife came to the party and had to leave early, so we introduced their gift first. It was a special gift they had picked out and it needed to be presented just so. Daddy put it together the day before and plugged it into the charger all night. Then, using a remote control, he drove it into the front room for Koko Bean to be surprised. And boy was she...

After showing Koko Bean the convertible, we made her put it aside to open the rest of her presents. I know. What a big tease right? As she opened each gift, some of her friends attempted to help her. This was not what Koko Bean had in mind. At each little hand helping, Koko Bean slapped it away with her little hand, informing her guest it was hers to open. After about ten minutes of this behavior, I pulled the plug on present opening for a moment to take Koko Bean to her room.

After promising her she would sit in her room the rest of the night if she kept it up, I eventually convinced her to apologize for her heathen-like behavior and we came back to the party where everyone was waiting. I was rather embarrassed of the way she was acting, but I think Daddy was more embarrassed that I exited the party with Koko Bean in hand to reprimand her. It may have been our fault for not letting her nap all day, but I wasn't going to let her get away with acting like that. She was a little better when we returned to open presents.

The party went as smoothly as any preschool age party would go after Koko Bean opened all her presents. Toys from the playroom were strewn out into the hallway. The dogs were taking advantage of dropped cupcake and cake pop crumbs. The men folk were downstairs gaming, while the mommies chatted it up, passing the newest little baby around like a baby doll and checking on the little ones who were running all over the place.

I think this party was as much of a party for mommy as it was for Koko Bean. I had fun making all the desserts, planning and decorating. I probably outdid myself, but I was up for the challenge. I think I found a new love- entertaining!! I also enjoyed being able to socialize outside of work and the gym, especially with friends I don't get to see often. I wholeheartedly appreciated every single person who attended Koko Bean's third birthday and I hope they all had as much fun as we did. Happy third birthday Koko Bean. You are my shining star, the light of my life and the best thing that has ever happened to your daddy and me. We love you!!

Brought to You by the Number THREE!

Koko Bean's THIRD birthday is today!! I would say three is my favorite age, but someone refuses to believe she's three. When asked how old she is, she will still tell you she's two and a half. I guess she's practicing for her second 29th birthday or something. I hope she agrees to be three soon because Mommy is super excited about her turning three. Three is definitely a fun age. I am looking forward to what three has to bring this year.

Three years ago today, Mommy got her real live baby doll and Daddy got his little daddy's girl. Now, she's a bonafied three-year-old with attitude, independence and sass. It doesn't get better than this. Here we go on this wild ride called THREE.

Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. ~Franklin P. Jones

January 5th, labor day

Well, here it is. It's the 11th day after Christmas, or as I like to call it, Labor Day. In about forty-five minutes, three years ago, I will have begun the most painful thing my body has ever gone through (besides a crazy leg workout.) At around 3:30pm on January 5, 2009, it began. Contractions!!! I imagined worst pain possible. I didn't imagine enough. However, the greatest Gift I've ever received came from those horrific contractions.

This little girl I carried in my womb for nine whole months, kicked me, flipped and flopped and positioned herself just so. I would literally have to wake her up in utero to get her to move her little hiny, just so I could roll out of bed. Now I can't get her to stop moving!!

We have many birthdays in January. My dad is January 2nd, Daddy's mom is January 5th, cousin Suzie is January 3th. Koko Bean's due date was January 9th. I had no idea when this kid was going to make her appearance, but she and God had it all planned out together. We started labor on Mema's birthday and she was born on her very own special day, January 6, 2009, or as most Christian religions believe, the Epiphany.

As I watched and listened to this little girl talk to her daddy on the phone the other night, I feel as if we've done a pretty good job thus far. She is growing up to be quite the confident, caring and smart little girl I had hoped for the whole nine months I was pregnant. Her daddy and I couldn't have asked for a more special little girl.

Happy Birthday Eve Miss Koko Bean!!

New Year's Day- The Final Defrocking

Today was the first day of 2012. No matter how you say it, even though the correct way is "twenty twelve," it's here. This means new beginnings, and a clean house!! In our house, Christmas decorations go up before Thanksgiving and come down by New Year's Day. This year was no different. Since we had nothing better to do this evening, Koko Bean and I did the final "defrocking" of the house. I bought a big Rubbermaid tub for our tree and we got to work. Koko Bean took each individual ornament off the tree, inspecting it, and saying her final goodbyes until Christmas 2012. She even mentioned the M&M one was her favorite, and I know it was difficult for her to part ways for the next twelve months.

After getting everything boxed up, we took it down to our massive storage room in the basement. I have a feeling that storage room might fill up faster than I thought.

When all the final pieces of tinsle and fake white pine tree needles were all swept and thrown away, I was finally at peace with my house. While I love Christmas and decorating and all the preparing, I really love decluttering. When my house is decluttered, my mind is free to stress about other things, like wait, I'm a potato chip Koko Bean??? Yes, Koko Bean threw two potato chips in a toy car, called it Mom and Dad and drove them around the living room. The pictures were taken before I swept the floor mind you.

Koko Bean later left "us" unattended and Chloe swooped in and had a little snack.

Ah yes, it's never ending. Tonight, Koko Bean also informed me that I was not nice. Why? Because I'm such a mean mommy, I won't let her go head first down the stairs!! That's why!! Ridiculousness ensues everyday in this kid's mind. She comes up with new things by the seat of her pants. Sometimes, it's quite embarassing. Like today, she pointed and yelled out about a very large man riding a mart cart at Wal-Mart, saying, "Mommy, look! He's bigger than everybody! LOOK!! No Mom, turn around. He's right there." I had to flee the situation immediately and tell her we don't point at people and we definitely don't talk about other people like that.

She's five days short of turning three, going on sixteen already. The backtalking has already started. When I say, "Koko Bean, we don't jump on the couch." She says, "Yes, we do Mommy. It's fine." Then I have to be the super bad guy and make her sit in her room. She will learn eventually...I hope. I'm just glad we're past the terrible two's. Now, onto to the terrific three's, right Moms and Dads with three-year-olds? Right?? Right?? Someone please answer me!!!

Happy New Year!



Saying Goodbye to the Year of Grace and Gratitude

2011 was an impeccable year. I could not have asked for a better year for our family. Our GNC stores were booming, I reached a fitness goal that was just a glimmer of hope three years ago, and Koko Bean has surpassed every milestone, surprising us every day with how intelligent she is.

Oh yeah, and one more little thing happened this year...

Mommy and Daddy got engaged!!! We will finally officially tie the knot May 12, 2012.

2011 took an angel with her this last year. My good friend Amanda passed away in June. When Koko Bean and I look at pictures of her, we talk about how she lives with God now in Heaven. I miss her more and more every day and I pray one day we meet again.

We are truly grateful for all our family and friends. We even have some new work friends and customer friends.

One man, in particular though, has influenced this last year the most. Actually, he's made the last five years successful for us. He is the most fair and reasonable man I've ever met. He has mentored both Daddy and me the last five years and we would not be where we are if it wasn't for him. And next to every good and honest man, is a good and honest woman. We thank you from the bottom of our hearts Eddie and Liz.

As I reflect on the past year and even the past three years, the time has flown by faster than a lightening bolt.Three years ago, December 31, was my last day of work before Koko Bean's arrival. Even as I sit here at 6am on the first day of 2012, perhaps a bit hungover, I just want to jump into this year feet first. There are many great things to come this year and even though Daddy is one of those "2012 crazies," I have full faith this is going to be an even better year than last.

So here's to you 2011...

We welcome 2012 with great hopes, dreams and potential milestones to achieve. I'm ready!!